Its Raining...

today is a rainy day again, like my heart too. I went to see the doc today , doc said i got thyroids so must take medication for at least one & a half year. I was shocked...speechless...frightened. MEDICATION for one & a half year is not long nor short lah but will there be any side effects??? I hope not leh... the doc gave me 2 types of med. 1 is to take 2 tablets in the morning & night another one is to take 6 tablets every morning. Your should see my reaction when I heard 6 TABLETS EVERY MORNING, my mouth was so wide-open. hopefully i will be able to cure after i eat the med. I ask the doc if i need any operation, he say now no need. OH MY GOD..that means there's possibilities lah...I never had any big injury( except last Nov i fell at work & broke my right hand and was in cast for 5 weeks) or any other operation before, so the word was never ever in my dictionary and noe I'm so scared. Ya...your would say after the OP will be alright one mah but it scare the hell out of me leh... I so scare what if the op is a failure? will there leave any scar? will i be able to talk as normal? so many questions float to my mind. Haiz...why i feel like that my life journey isn't as smooth sailing as it should be? So many obstacles for me to cross, so many troubles for me to face.
Well... never mind. Along the way I still have my loved ones with me, my Family, my Friends & my Colleagues. They are my precious leh...no one could take them away from me...NO...NEVER...
I really appreciate the care & concern yr given me. Million THANKS...


Life is like a bicycle. You don't fall off unless you stop pedaling.

It takes both rain & sunshine to make a rainbow.

Happy & Sad Day again...

Dear All

Today is a happy & sad day again...

Well...lets start with happy things first. today i went to meet 2 groups of friend. I first met Janice & Xuan (very long never meet them liao) We met in the late afternoon to have our dinner @ kfc. After that we went shop around @ Toa Payoh, Xuan bought the Lovers in Paris vcd le...haha...i told her i don't want to lend her the vcd coz my BAO BEI leh... haha...so pissed off by me...keke... then after that in the evening i met up with Serene, Sheena, Siyun & Irene...we also ages never met up leh...then you know what...Serene say meet 8pm @ Clarke Quay mrt station so after i part off with Janice & Xuan i go take mrt to Dobhy Ghaut change to north east line lor...then i reach Dobhy Ghaut liao, NaNa call me say Serene will be late, will meet us @ 9pm, then she @ Siyun home @ Lakeview leh...WAH PIANG... then i already going take north east line liao then call me...but NaNa say she also duno i got go & she dun have my hp no. until Serene give her... I nealy fainted xia...then ask me to wait for her & Siyun at PS so fine i went Delifrance to sit lor... Wah Piang i was carring a book & 4 sets of vcds leh..u know how heavy?? my hand nearly drop xia... haha... then half an hr then they reach PS so we went Long John Silver makan, coz they haven makan, then after that we took cab to News Room Bar...then i knew i came to this bar b4 coz that time my friend Zhi got showcase tics to A-Do mini concert and its held @ that bar lor.. in the end turn up so boring inside, juz take photo & drink only... then we left ard 11+ so damn xian xia.... Siyun go off first lor...coz she take train so damn far leh... then after that Irene, NaNa & Serene took cab together i took alone lor... reach home hungry already so went to buy noodles home to eat..then Serene called to chech if i reach home not...she say so damn xian xia today... haha... AH.. the guy who serve us drinks quite yandao leh...haha..NaNa & Irene tok photo wif tat guy...I also WANT... but so damn paisei xia...haha.. and NaNa & Irene even took photo together when they kisiing...YEAH... they both mouth to mouth leh...haha...nearly fainted.. only take photo very fun other then tat we juz tok abit then listen to music..overall abit xian but its good to see old friends lor...

Well...my Sad part liao... my Thyroid result is out and its Positive...i cried few times today...totally spoil my outing mood xia..cried in the bus too, lucky not much people, i was seating at the end of the bus. told this news to my mum, my friends & colleagues...all kept saying will be fine want lor... but I'm still so damn sad lor...Lin check up on the net more abt the illness then she say got to control my diet lor...certain things cannot eat liao. My this buddy always so sweet leh.. THANKS LIN. luv u. tomorrow i will go see doc & see what will it be lor.. hopefully not that serious lor..
another thing is today Landy told me she will be going interview on Mon as Event Planner, so Sad everybody starts to plan to leave liao.. then while i was at the bar, my sayang Siti msg me this - "Suddenly I feel empty knowing that all of us will be going our separate ways. Sad to say good bye to stranger who becomes my buddies. Its not easy to find good colleagues like all of us. PEACE". she sent to not only me lor.. at that point my heart pain after seeing her msg, i agree with her lor.. its so hard to find colleagues like them who is so fun loving lor... haiz..want to cry again... then Landy also msg me saying - "Working in this company sucks, but to be able to know u & sayang, I've no regrets". WAH PIANG i think they want me to cry untill very cham leh... today is already a very sad day for me when i know my results then they still msg me this thing... wah lau.. think our last day, my co will flood xia... flooding with our tears...It's really fate that brought us to colleagues lor, and i know i will miss them ALOT & ALOT lor...and i might not even find such good colleagues in my life liao lor... =.(


We cannot tell what may happen to us in the strange medley of life. But we can decide what happens in us...how we can take it, what we can do with it...and that is what really counts in the end.

When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things-not the great occasions-that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.

Happy or Sad???

Today is a happy or sad day??? Happy coz finally saw my stege guy... i haven't seen him ard 2 weeks liao leh... he cut his hair AGAIN... walau...so nerd xia... then Siti still say good wat...yr perfect match... KNS. wat is she trying to say??? I nerd oso??? +_+ so sad...Sad...bcoz i saw him today with a gal, she waiting for him to knock off.... think shld be gf liao lor...rite??
Happy bcoz Xuan is not being selected for her overseas attachment, Y i happy?? coz if she go there, it will be like 2 years leh...not a short time loh....Y i sound like i'm her bf like tat??? coz i don't want to end up in the airport flooding with my tears, couple of years ago, one of my sec sch friend went to Melbourne to study and we cried at the airport, i don't want to end up crying AGAIN... and another thing is her "bf" is in Australia for attachment too, not that i don't want them to meet, is just that the guy SUCKS... for wat reasons??? sorry i cannot tell yr but he juz hurt my friend. thats all i can say lor coz if my friend see this she will kill me leh...haha..i don't want to die so early leh...keke...she say i very bad coz i say i want to celebrate for her not being selected...hehe...
Sad bcoz of my sayang ita, she is quiting soon...she needs to prepare for her poly things....so sad...she say she is so sad that she is quiting so soon coz her mum ask her to quit earlier so that she can have more rest before school starts.... haiz.... my side here duno change how many part-timers liao...she say she will miss us very badly lor...i dun wana cry again hor.... i will miss her...badly...
ok will stop now...want to continue my neopet liao...nite...


Love is an attempt to change a piece of the dream world into reality.

Confused

My knees start to shake,
When you're in sight.
My mind is filled with wonder,
My heart with fright.

When will this feeling stop?
When did it start?
How can I listen to my mind,
Without breaking my heart?

I'm so confused.
What should I do?
I can't think of anything,
Except you.

Should I ignore you,
Or just give it time?
I can't think straight,
My heart controls my mind.

I cried

today i cry at work...WHY??? coz one of my sayang colleague Lala last day of work and I kept thinking of my last day at work sure very sad one coz i LOVE my colleague very much like Sena, Land, Siti, Juita, Lala, Fanice & Anom... they are all so nice man.... And today Anom also officially terminate from work coz she have been MIA at work for quite a couple of days, she got something cropped up at home and she didn't even called us... these 2 gers (Anom & Lala) came to work at the same day then last day of work also same day, so funny... but its really sad that they left i mean its really nice being colleagues with them man.... haiz...so sad... ah... Lin don't come killing me if u tink this is not worth crying OK.... hehe... Yest read Jenny's blog damn funny xia... haha... think she muzt be so pissed off leh...ok lah i shall stop now... Lin want to read my blog...so IMPATIENT +_+

Recommendations...

well...recently found a korean drama very nice. HIGHLY RECOMMEND Title: Lovers in Paris. This is a very typical type of korean drama, fairytale Cinderella story that I think don't really exist in real life. The story goes like that - Rich boy meets Poor gal, conflicts in the begining, fell in love, Rich boy's dad force him to marry another gal, background & status problem they were force to seperate. They really love each other so the Poor gal wanted to fly to other country to forget him, 2 yrs later the Rich boy flew to the country and find her and its happy ending... It was the part they broke off touched my heart coz whoever boy/gal broke off with their bf/gf will know the heart pain esp when both of your still love each other, the type of pain I really don't know how to describe but juzt pain & pain... so both of their tears just kept falling and MINE TOO.... so sad xia... this show in Korea is very popular... so muzt watch....

Love

Love is red like a rose
Love is green like the grass
Love is the moments you don't want to pass

Love is bright like the sun
Love is wet like the rain
Love is giving and losing and learning and pain

Love smells fresh like the flowers
It's blue as the sky
It's your smile when you laugh and your tears when you cry

Love is soft like a baby
It's rough like the sand
Love is the feeling of holding a hand

Love can't be bought
For no price is it sold
Love is the woman who's wrinkled and old

It's the chirp of the birds as they sing to the trees
It is sweet just like honey and sounds like the bees

Love is a teddy bear missing its eyes
Love comes in every shape, colour and size

Love is the boy who just lost his first tooth
Love can grow old but it still keeps its youth

Love is the friend that you always will miss
Love's not uptight but a warm gentle kiss

Love is hot chocolate on a cold winter day
Love is the child that asked you to play

Love sings not solo but sings in a pair
Love is not selfish, it's something you share

Love is the sickness we all want to feel
Love is a Band-Aid that helps you to heal

Love is accepting and caring and kind
When you're not looking it's something you'll find

When your beauty is gone, you are wrinkled and old
You will always have love it can never be sold

When you grow old, and after you're gone
Your spirit will live through the love you've passed on.

Dear Boy

Dear Boy,

I do not know who you are, or where or when we will meet, but i do hope it is soon.

I pray that when we meet and fall in love, you will love me for me, and not hope for someone who is thinner or prettier. I hope you won't compare me to girls who may have brighter smiles or better grades, or who can jump higher. I hope that you will make me laugh, take care of me if i get sick, and be trustworthy.

I hope you will remember that i prefer roses to daisies, and that my favourite colour changes with my mood. Please know that my eyes aren't blue; they're brown.

Please know that I might be too shy to kiss you first, but please don't be afarid. I won't slap you or push you away. I'm sure your kisses will be perfect. When we go on date, please don't stress about where to take me; what's important is that I'm with you.

If I cry, please know it isn't because of you; just hold me close and I'll heal quickly. And, if it is because of you, I'll heal just the same.

And if we decide to break up, please understand that I may be bitter, but I'd like to be your friend if you'll let me. I promise to remember that you have feelings, too, even though you'll never admit it, and when you are ready, we'll have a "special friendship."

Please tell me if anything I do bothers you, or if something just doesn't sit right. I would like you to always be honest with me. If I had a bad day, I hope you will shower me with confidence and smiles.

I hope you don't think that I'm asking too much of you. I hope you understand that I'm a little nervous and very scared. I wish I could tell you how or when we will meet, and if we will be in love forever. Every relationship is a new game of cards, and...(sigh)... I've never been good at cards. But I will try my best to be kind and love you dearly for all that you are, without expecting too much from you. Thank you for listening-this is all that I ask.

Yours always,
Pauline

Nearly tender my resignation...

Today i nearly tender my resignation, really can't stand the HONGKIE(OM) lor.... she always giving us alot of problems leh.... Eee..... shit her....
today then realise my friend PH ROM is actually on the 28 mar not 25 mar....haha..i really very blur lor... anyway i already requested my off day on the 25 mar liao so i will just only attend her buffet dinner at her house... so envious of my friends, alot getting ROM this year... I also want to settle down leh... =( sad xia... still abit worried about my medical report...haiz.... my life is so unsmooth sailing leh... wat if my report is really positive??? haiz...k i shouldn't think too much...
Yeah... tomorrow is my off day.... can sleep whole day le...keke... happy...
recently watch the show Son of the Mask & The Pacifier liao, nice show quite funny...
ah... i register the neo pet leh...so damn angry yesterday want to find food for my pet so damn difficult... all sold out then i kept refresh the page. KNS man.... finally after alot of try manage to buy 2 hotdog for my pet... haha....
k lah nothing to update liao.... nite...


QUOTE
Be slow in choosing a friend,
Slower in changing a friend.

Everybody late!!

well.. yesterday i said tat my sayang Siti angry with me right? yah she really angry with me bcoz she thought i angry with her...haha... we very funny one lor... but the even more funny thing is that my sayang Siti today she actually work morning shift then have to reach shop at 10.45am but she forgotten she work morning shift today, more worse is she live in JB, haha, the she reach shop at 12+ & our Operating Manager (OM) call her up coz now every morning when we reach shop got to call her (ma fan) then coz she never receive sayang call so she call her & my sayang also blur leh then she(OM) ask sayang what time she will reach so sayang say 12.30pm then OM was like Oh...Siti it's very serious blah blah..... in her hong kong accent(OM is from Hong Kong) hahaha so funny then she say ok Siti i will go down the shop and open the door first then you know WHAT..... she say to sayang you got to pay for my cab fare....OH GOD i mean she an Operating Manager asking $ from her....she really KNS lor....can't stand her man.... then the funny part is she reach liao open the door but she don't have store room key.... WALAU... like that wait for my sayang to reach lah.... really CAN'T STAND HER then she still can tell my part timer Juita that she haven't brush her teeth, wash her face.... OH.....ok...enough of her, i everytime saw her just spoil my day coz she will be Pauline blah blah.... Pauline blah blah blah......ARGH..... don't like her.....then i today also nearly late, nearly want to take cab but my bus appear so took bus instead.... than sayang Landy also late...haha today is LATE DAY....only my sayang Juita is not late...
Had a very busy day today coz we got anniversary sales up to 40% then alot KIASU Singaporean come lor...OH...the KIASUISM very "jia lat" lor.... see the ugly side of them...oh god.... then mess up the clothes all these make me no mood to arrange also just heck care at night then do....haha if i arrange properly will still end up very messy... haiz... tomorrow full shift so tired.... my stupid flu haven't recover also....
Cousin Billy call me up today, actually wanted to call him yesterday but too tired then he say lucky never call him also coz these few days he field training (now serving NS) then hp low batt. haha... told him about the Thyroid thing... so scare.... what if its really positive??? oh gosh...cross my fingers....he go "chiong" again, this guy hor....haha



WHEN YOU HAVE TO COPE WITH A LOT OF PROBLEMS, YOU'RE EITHER GOING TO SINK OR YOU'RE GOING TO SWIM.
Tom Cruise

I won't be left behind

I run my fastest
But still get beat.
I land on my head
When I should be on my feet.
I try to move forward,
But I am stuck in rewind.
Why do I keep at it?
I won't be left behind.

The harder I am thrown,
The higher I bounce.
I give it my all,
And that's all that counts.
In first place,
Myself, I seldom find.
So i push to the limit-
I won't be left behind.

Some people tell me you can't,
Some say don't.
Some say simply give up.
I reply, I won't.

The power is here,
Locked away in my mind.
My perseverance is behind my excellence,
I won't be left behind.

Make the best of each moment,
The future is soon the past.
The more I tell myself this,
The less I come in last.
Throughout my competitions,
I've learned what winning is about.
A plain and clear lesson-
Giving up is the easy way out.

So every night before I go to bed,
I hope in a small way I have shined.
Tomorrow is a brand-new day,
And I won't be left behind.

CHANGES

"Friends forever," you promised.
"Together till the end."
We did everything with each other.
You were my best friend.

When i was sad, you were by my side.
When i was scared, you felt my fear.
You were my best support-
If i needed you, you were there.

You were the greatest friend,
You always knew what to say:
You made everything seem better.
As long as we had each other,
Everything would be okay.

But somewhere along the line,
We slowly came apart.
I was here, you were there,
It tore a hole in my heart.

Things were changing,
Our cheerful music reversed its tune.
It was like having salt without pepper,
A sun without its moon.

Suddenly we were miles apart,
Two different people, with nothing the same.
It was as if we hadn't been friends;
Although we knew deep in our hearts
Neither one of us was to blame.

You had made many new friends
And luckily, so had I
But that didn't change the hurt-
The loss of our friendship made me cry.

As we grow older, things must change
But they don't always have to end.
Even though it is different, now,
You will always be my FRIEND.

A Drowsy Day!!!

this morning wake up with a drowsy mind, was abit late for work coz something crop up & i think i made my dear sayang siti angry. i do really think she's angry with me coz i msg her & cal her she din pick up the phone nor reply my msg. so sad +_+ got to see tomorrow is she still angry with me. Well today food menu is kind of plain, have bread for breakfast, kueh & fruits for lunch & bee hoon soup for dinner, kind of too plain liao, so i hate being sick, coz everytime i sick i always tend to think of eating very heaty food, but can't eat..... oh god... Today is a very long day, kind of feel like sleeping the whole day, strange? i din take my med in the morning coz i know if i took the med i won't be able to go work already...haha, even though i dinn't eat the med i juz feel like SLEEPING think the med din really went off this morning coz i'm fine after my dinner break...haha kind of too late right? try to take a nap but can't coz my coleague packing stock inside the store room & it's kind of noisy so i can't SLEEP....I'm afraid later i take the med again tomorrow will be drowsy again, ok cross my finger...
Actually today while working something was juz in my mind, i know i shall not think of him but he just filled my mind. HOW to forget someone you really love most?? I know alot of people will say juz keep it inside one corner of my heart & as times pass i will be able to forget & one fine day i will be able to let this something inside one corner of my heart out & juz will laugh it off on how silly my life have been. (don't know anyone can understand not) It has been like 6, 7 years already and he has his own life,gf all these and i'm just like standing at the same point to wait for him??? to know that he won't be back already. well... call me silly call me stupid but it was HE that made me know what its like to be loved, to be doted on & most importantly someone there for me, i know its all over but i just somehow need to talk it out so here i am writing this thing telling yr how i feel. ok enough of this nonsense, otherwise i won't be able to sleep. good nite!!

Effects of the med

After i took the flu & cough medicine, the effects took me half an hour to make me drowsy and i slept from 4+ to 8+ nearly to 9pm, so tired xia but during the sleep still managed to hear my phone beeping. haha. but i manage to see the message after i woke up, saw my cousin's gf message me saying to postphone our outing( she wanted to buy a pair of Nike shoe, ask me to accompany her go Queensway to buy) to later date coz next week she busy with her exam thing. Then my buddy Lin message me did i manage to check out Thyroid? so i reply her yap but dunno wat it says alot of Chim things, haha, she say she check out on net also then she also dunno wat it says but if never take medicine regularly will lead to other sickness. so thoughtful of her. Oh so scary, hope the results after 2 weeks will be negative. My coleague message me in the afternoon to tell me to cut down on the mid nite oil, MSN, ask me to rest more, so sweet of her. ok shall stop now. until the next post....

I'm SICK

oh i'm sick today, having a bad sore throat, flu & cough. And guess what the doc suspect me of Thyroid. OMG wats actually Thyroid??? i searched the net & couldn't really understand it.... oh... who can tell me wats tat actually???? The doc ask me to take blood test and the result will be out in 2 weeks & you know wat they took 2 stringe (izit how to describe???) of blood out and its abit painful. =(
this is the first time on blog & i abit don't know what to say and my medicine is taking effect, i'm abit drowsy now + _ + ok i'm going for nap. Zzzzzzzz...